


you drew stars around my scars

by Anonymous



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Past Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, Pining, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony-centric
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-09
Updated: 2020-08-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:20:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25797289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: It was impossible to feel Steve's kisses linger when six years has passed since he last held Tony.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Comments: 5
Kudos: 11
Collections: Anonymous





	1. i knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss

**Author's Note:**

> Title and Chapter Titles are from Cardigan by T.Swift

They were slowdancing, blissed out in their own bubble. The lights were dim as several couples join the newly wedded heroes.

Scott cried when Hope walked on the aisle. He's still crying now even when he's holding her in his arms, dancing to their love song.

Tony swirls the glass in his hands, watching as the golden liquid sloshes. He takes another sip, and the bitter fluid goes down his throat with a mild burn.

They were slowdancing, chests pressed closed. Steve and Bucky looked ethereal, like a renaissance painting came alive. Steve whispers something in Bucky's ear and the other man throws his head back as he laughs.

It's intimate. Tony feels like a voyeur.

When they kiss, Tony turns away.

His hand touches his own lips as he remembers,

\-- remembers the night when Steve told him he gave him a home,

\-- remembers the cold rain falling and water seeping to his shirt as they run back to the tower,

\-- remembers the warmth press of Steve's body as he held him when the nightmares came,

\-- remembers the soft, chapped lips kissing the tears away.

He remembers the time when he was Steve's. When Steve was his.

It was impossible to feel Steve's kisses linger when six years has passed since he last held Tony. 

But he feels the ghost of him.

Tony empties his drink, places the glass on the table, and leaves.


	2. i knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs

Burying himself with missions and projects is how Tony copes.

There was so much to be done after the snap restored the universe. Tony takes them all, hopes that exhaustion will distract his thoughts, will help him let go. Any excuse to distance himself from Steve. 

But sometimes,

Sometimes he can't run away.

His mind wanders, and it often does bring him back to the memory when they fell apart. He curses how vividly he remembers that day in the bunker. 

It's funny, he said 'Resentment is corrosive'. 

He never said 'Regret is worse'.

He doesn't resent Steve or Bucky. For a while, he did. Half of the universe vanishing made him realize that hate is a strong word. Anger is what he felt. He could never resent Steve.

He wonders, about the what-ifs and maybe. That world of endless possibilities. 

What if Steve stayed? What if he told him the truth? What if Tony ran away with him? What if the Accords never happened?

There's just, just so many things that could have happened. Tony wonders if there ever was another world where they never let go.

He wonders if there was a world where he wouldn't be haunted by what-ifs.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm in the mood to write a devastatingly, heart crunching angst.


End file.
